the sun rises and I arrive not quite home But on my shoulders I carry with me 7 years of What was supposed to be There was no question No reason There were some signs I didn’t think they would stop us It wasn’t good What we had I was selfish You were squashed There wasn’t time There was too much time There was fear I was frozen I needed to survive I wasn’t sure you’d let me You would not have let me In the end, it was about you In the end, I was scared Squashed Unable to walk my own neighborhood Without feeling you haunting My every step Stalking Hunting Preying on me I’m not sure what changed I know what changed And it had nothing to with me You had nothing to do with me I soaked my loneliness in the crumbs you gave And I still don’t know why you bothered It was sudden, The moment I knew I hadn’t left Despite your screams My heart sank When you chose Her Once again Over me who filled you Only with light But dared to have whims Me who beared the burden Of the time you could not speak Me who could never be right Unseen, unheard Were those who hurt you louder? Or did my words matter less Did my soul not reach yours? Could I not save you? While still saving myself It's just her nature She doesn’t know your culture Her temperament Her personality Her manners Always your turn deciding its mine was the worst crime
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